Letters to Me: Dear Harley

Dear Me,

It’s been 1,076 days since those 7 words “we think he may have down syndrome” changed your whole world view, so unexpected, so life-altering. If I could go back, I would hold your hand in that very moment. I would look you in the eyes and offer the grace you so desperately needed, the grace you deserved.

I won’t list all the “you did everything right” things, though you did. You adapted quickly. You made choices to support your children. You kept going when it would’ve been easier to fall apart. But that’s who you’ve always been: strong, adaptable, steady in the storm. What i will say is this: it’s okay to cry. It’s okay to grieve the version of life you thought you'd have. It’s okay to feel that heartbreak, to panic at the unknown, to lie awake wondering what this would mean for your children and the future you envisioned for them. It’s okay to question everything you thought you understood about the world.

You’ve walked so many uncertain roads, some that felt like dead ends, some that made you feel like life had closed its doors on you forever. But that feeling, that fear? It was a lie. Life wasn’t over. It was just beginning again; different, yes, but still yours.

I won’t pretend it’s been easy. These 1,076 days have been filled with struggle and heart break in ways I never could have imagined. Honestly, there may be more struggles ahead but I also won’t let you forget the incredible things you’ve done. In these 1,076 days, you found your voice. You became an advocate, a builder of bridges, a creator of community. You discovered a passion for inclusion and made space for others to feel seen, heard, and valued.

You’ve built a village; one grounded in love, support, and fierce devotion to your family. And your kids? They’ve grown right alongside you. They’ve learned to adapt. They’ve found joy again. And somehow, piece by piece, it’s all fallen into place, so beautifully that one day, you’ll look back and wonder why you ever doubted it would.

You didn’t just survive. You transformed. I’m so incredibly proud of who we turn out to be.

Written by Harley, Ambassador Kolton's mum